Can't lift my mood

by Louie
(Coventry)

I always seem in a negative state of mind and it really drags me down and the people around me. I always feel tearful and have painful memories filling my head. I deal with it by doing alcohol because it makes me feel slightly better. Unrequited love and feeling like a failure are the reasons for me not believing in myself. I'm always thinking about it and makes me realise how much of a let down i am to myself and other people.

I've been to counselling and psychotherapy, but nothing seems to fix the problem. Maybe i just have a low value of myself and think its normal to live in a permanent state of self doubt and low esteem. Sometimes it can be hard to bear and it becomes a battle everyday to not let the depression win. Sometimes i feel in despair. I know i have a great life with supportive family and friends. Just i need a way of dealing with this issue by myself and stop depending on others to try and make my depression and anger go away.