Confused, low confidence, and fearful of the situation, lazy

by gaju
(virginia)

I am going through bad patch of time that may be financially, career wise or relation wise. I want to get out of it, and want to know what I have to do with my life before I want to socialize, or can talk with new people who intend to keep on coming on my life.

I have low confidence as I feel that whatever I do I can not do it really well, or could not do it nicely. I always try to give more than 100 percent. I want to help other people in every way I can, but right now I can not even help myself. I feel shy and nervous when I interact with a group of new people. I think a lot about every situation that is going to happen, and just do not do at all if I feel it is going to be worthless before even giving a try.

I really want to achieve something special in life, but in fact I am ruining my life. I am trying to be a better person each and everyday, but I am being a worse person each day, and feel like I am getting further from being a better person each day.

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Most of us have been there and done that
by: Anonymous

When one is faced with a scary situation and people around you are making it worse, it is easy to lose it.

I faced a crisis many years ago and looking back I could have dealt with it better but I just flopped. It took me a long time to get myself together again and I have always lacked confidence and been frightened of what people could do to me.

Now I see had I done more to stand up for myself at the time, I might have salvaged something even if it were only my self esteem, and I might have had the gumption to go ahead and do what I had to.

Counselling may help short term to enable you to see where you are at and what changes you can make to find a way to work through this. It is not easy and it will take time. If you have friends who believe in you and can give you courage, it will be a step forward.

Later on you will look back and think it was awful but I have come a long way since and I have learned a lot in the process. I will have gained insight and skills that I did not know I had all the time.

Choices
by: Kay

Thank you for contacting Positive Personal Growth. No one can tell you how to live your life, what to do, or what to think, only you have the power to do this.

You are filled with conflicting thoughts, the negative ones have taken over your daily life and now you live in a negative way that is bringing you down and making you fearful in things you do.

You have choices, your own choices, not those of others. At the moment, as difficult as this may be to hear, you are choosing to be a negative person. I know this sounds crazy, because this is not how you want to be, but truth be told you do choose to be this way, because your thoughts are your own and you have chosen negative over positive.

When you can accept this you should realise that when you choose to be negative you also have the ability to choose to be positive. Makes sense? I hope so!

Your life has been formed by the thoughts you have, and so it is up to you to alter these thoughts from negative to positive, by constantly changing any negative 'I can't do this' thought to one of 'I can do this'.

Stop thinking about what will happen in future situations because all this is doing is bringing fear into your life. How can you know what happens until it is actually happening to you, and when it is happening, then you can choose your thoughts so that it happens in the way you want it to. Which could be, 'I am confident, everyone likes me and I enjoy speaking to them'.

Don't give up because of what you think might happen, you can make your life unfold as you want it to simply by changing the thoughts you have.

Don't 'try' to be a better person, 'be' a better person. Believe it and make it so. The future you have is your choice, you can read this advice and say you can't do it, or you can choose to change the negative way of thinking that has become your way of life and become the positive confident person you long to be.

I wish you a happy, positive future.

Love
Kay
x

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