How do I help my husband?

by Stacy
(TN)

My husband was recently laid off and is trying to find a job in this horrible economy.

He is very intelligent and could be a great asset if given the opportunity, but his low self esteem keeps him not only from looking, but keeps him from considering viable options and he talks himself out of an offer before even giving it a chance.

What can I do to make him see his value?

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Help my husband
by: Ramzi

My recommendation will be sit down with your husband with a blank sheet of paper and draw a cross on it. On one side write strengths, and on the other write weaknesses.

Then start helping him to write down all his strengths one by one and build on that strength by focusing on his accomplishments and how that makes him feel.

Do the same with the weaknesses. You will be surprised how many times ones strength exceeds their weakness.

If a person wants to improve they should focus on making weakness become strength for two reasons.

1) Your strengths will always be with you.

2) Over coming weakness actually improves self-esteem and builds confidence.

Best of luck.

Ramzi

low self esteem
by: Kay

Hello Stacy

Thank you for contacting Positive Personal Growth. It must be very demoralizing for your husband to have lost his job.

Can you help to make him see that when he thinks negative thoughts about himself, he gets a negative result?

His thoughts make his reality and when he dwells on what he believes he can't do, or the negative reasons why he wont get the job, then he is right, and he wont get the job.

Unfortunately he is the only one who can help
himself, and until he changes his thought pattern to a positive way of thinking he will find it very difficult to raise his self esteem.

Be as supportive as you can, let him know that he can choose to be positive rather than negative.
We all have a choice to be how we are, and if he can accept this as true, he will be on the way to altering the way he is.

The DVD The Secret, is amazing and if you can purchase this and perhaps watch it with him a couple of times, it could help him to realize that with a change in thought pattern he can change his future. There is also the book of The Secret if he prefers reading to watching the DVD.

I hope everything works out for you both.

Kind regards,
Kay

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