Low low low confidence/esteem

by Sock Monkey
(Coolsville,Colorado, USA)

I have really low self esteem. I have thought of ending it all a couple times. And even cut my wrist once just to see how it felt. I had dreams of jumping out of moving cars smashing myself on the road. Yes it`s very gross, but it`s very real.

Once I took too many pills to see what would happen. Nothing did.
My esteem is shot. I have so many fears it`s amazing.
According to my brother I never go out with good looking guys. I go with "The Peoples Reject". It is kinda true. I went out with guys that belittle me, curse at me, blame me for all types of things, and don`t respect me. I am not a big girl or anything. I am proportioned right so a lot of guys are not interested in me. They want other things. So therefore I have a easily hard time trusting men. I mean really hard time.

I don`t have a job right now. Although I do have certificates and education and stuff. My dream is to be a nurse and be a normal 32 y/o female. That's my dream. But as you probably guessed, I have to many issues for this to come about.
I was feeling better about myself. Then I had an accident. Now I don`t know what to do with myself.
I am not happy. I have nothing wrong with me. Some even call me pretty. But for all the ones that say I am, there is the ones that say I am not and I believe them. I don`t know why I am writing this. I don`t know why I am here.

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ok..
by: Sock Monkey

Ok what if the person is someone I know and love. And does not see they are making me feel this way.
In one way they make me feel great about myself. But on the other hand they make me feel so stupid.
I am trying to get better. Heck, I`m 32 with no one, no job, and the fact that I gotta go back to school again. Then it has taken me all this time cause I have been so scared.
I wish sometimes someone can take over my life or at least tell me what to do with myself.
P.s cutting does not make you feel good. Well it does but it only makes you feel good for two three mins. And then you gotta spend your time looking at where you cut yourself. And think,"Wow, I`m such a loser I can`t even do it right.."
Low low self esteem.
by: Anonymous

Ask yourself why you feel the way you do, who has put you down. Regardless of who we are, we all have talents and abilities and we have to find them. Then we have to develop the strong parts of our personalities.

Just take a moment to sit down and write out all the things you do well and you know that you could do well.

Very few people go through life feeling confident all the time. We all have doubts and fears and taking one step at a time, we can overcome them.
Talk and associate with people who make you feel good, there will always be others who will not give the time of day, they are not worth worrying about if they are just interested in themselves. Family can be negative, neither are they worth worrying about. There will be supportive people around, you do not need to go on feeling a victim. Counselling may also help

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