Past Relationship Jealousy

by Whitney
(Canada)

I'm 22 and have been with a perfect man for almost 3 years now. To me, our relationship is exactly a fairy-tale.

At the beginning of our relationship, he felt that he was not good enough for me and also felt the need to tell me about all of his past relationships and sexual experiences. Sadly, although its been 3 years, I still find myself bringing up his past, starting arguments, quoting him, and threatening to end our perfect relationship.

For example: He had a relationship and was once engaged to a woman who had a son. Sometimes, I find myself telling him 'you once had a family, why are you with me?' and 'If you propose to me, I would be the SECOND girl you ever propose to' ....not to mention the detailed sexual things he once told me.

I have always suffered from self-esteem issues, but I never had so much to lose before. His parents and sister have a horrible habit of mentioning his past girlfriends and commenting with them on facebook as well which will always bring me down no matter what anyone else says.

This man treats me like gold and I know he doesn't deserve me picking on him like this. I cry a lot and feel depressed but when I'm not thinking about it (or it's not shoved in my face by his mother or sister) we get along beautifully.

I would love some advice. I heard a lot of cliches like 'that's the past, not the present', or 'he's with you not them!' But they seem to have no effect. I know its a matter of confidence and low self-esteem, but I don't really know what to do.