The Things Children Say

by Anne
(United Kingdom)

When my children were small, many years ago, I decided to write down the funny things that they said. My son is now 35 and my daughter 32. They both have children of their own.


We have good fun taking the book out every few years to read what was said, sometimes much to their embarrassment!

You have asked for comments, so here goes!

Can't remember what I answered when James, aged 5, asked me "Was I made in Hong Kong mum?" This is the question that inspired me to take notes!

I heard my daughter, Tracey, then aged 2, scream (at a spider). I heard James stamp his foot, and say to her "I've trodden on that, so I've killed it, that means it's dead. When you die you go to heaven to live with God."

Silence for a few seconds, then heard James, "Well that never went did it?"


Tracey, aged 6 "When I grow up, if I have a baby, and it's a boy I'm going to sell it, cos I hate yukki boys!"

(She is now the proud mother of two sons!)


Tracey aged 6, to me, obviously fed up waiting for her bread and honey.

"I wish you had 8 legs, then you could stand on the middle ones and do everything"!

I am now a grandmother and it is happening all over again!

I was in the garden talking to Michael, aged 4 he asked
"Have you got a baby in your tummy?"

Me "No I haven't."

Michael "I think you have."

Me "Why do you think that?" (I shouldn't have asked!!)

Michael "Because you've got a yump, and I haven't got a yump". (He meant lump!)

Me "Well you will probably have a yump when you are older."

That was the time I decided to diet!

The years go so fast. I hope anyone who hasn't thought of writing down the funny things their children have said will start to. It's easy to forget and really nice to have a read through every few years or so.

Comments for The Things Children Say

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Never go into chemists with your children!
by: Zuleika

When my children were small, I had to take them everywhere with me, and that included hospital antenatal clinics, doctor's appointments, everywhere. But the only place where they would comment was the chemist.

Aaron, then aged 3, wandered off to look at the shelves while I was waiting for a prescription and suddenly he announced, in a packed chemist, "Mummy! Here's your nappies round here!"

Another time, about three years later, while I was in the same (unfortunately by this time they knew me well, and yes it was packed) chemist with my younger son, Robert, then 4. He was looking at a small display shelf on the counter with small packets on it, looking puzzled. And he said, "Mummy, what are these for?" Face red, I said the first thing that came into my head - they're for people who can't behave themselves!

Later on one of my relatives explained to her children that they were baby-catchers, to which one of my children replied, "Don't be silly, Aunty, they're not big enough to put a baby in!"
What Children Say
by: Kay

What a fantastic idea, writing down what your children have said. I loved reading it all. You never said whether you managed to get rid of your 'yump'! I am sure others will now want to see if they can better what you have told us! Thanks very much for sharing.

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